Thanks everyone for the activity suggestions. I particularly like the painting with pudding suggestion and the link that JenO sent. I do occasionally draw with Noah but that normally becomes a battle to keep him from eating the writing utensils. He’s not completely art ready yet but hopefully that is coming soon. On the art link Jen sent it suggested giving the infant stamps to lick and stick for art. Am I the only one who thinks I would be insane to have my child licking all that glue? Gross.
Of course I have to admit I’ve been getting pretty chemical phobic lately. And it has everything to do with the work I’ve been doing for my friend Julie’s new organic salon. (Well that and multiple childhood viewings of The Incredible Shrinking Woman.) In preparation for working on press release and ad copy for the salon I had to do a lot of research into organic personal care products and their benefits – and it scared the bejezus out of me. I’ve been reading countless articles and studies about the toxicity and health risks of many hair products – specifically the high cancer causing effects of repetitive hair dye use. In the past I’ve dyed my hair nearly every color in the book – often on top of each other and I’ve used anything I could get my hands on. I don’t think I’ll be going back down that road. I’m gonna have Julie use an organic and non-toxic dye to take my hair back to an approximation of it’s dull yet natural shade and see how long it takes me to feel overwhelmingly compelled to dye it purple. But it isn’t just the hair dye I’m worried about. I’m now concerned about the safety of everything - our cleaning products, the candles I burn, the products I use on my face and most importantly anything I use directly on Noah. I’d love to go out and buy Simple Green, soy candles and natural baby care products but they don’t come cheap and there’s no way we can afford to upgrade to that level of spending right now. As a result I’m not really making any changes, just worrying about everything. So nothing new there.
The one completely natural thing I give to Noah is breast milk – and I’m once again thinking a lot about the future of that exercise. My friends and family seem to not only be encouraging me to give it up after his birthday, but almost prodding me about it. I don’t know why everyone is in such a hurry for it to end. Why are people so wierded out by it? In other countries people nurse until their kids are two and three but Americans think it’s peculiar. Anyway – back to the idea of weening the boy. I no longer feed Noah on demand. In fact, except for the feeding he gets when he first wakes up in the morning (so I don’t have to jump out of bed to feed him breakfast), all his other feedings are used as devices to put him to sleep. Though he’s not always completely asleep by the end of a feeding he’s really drowsy and it normally only takes me a couple of minutes of rocking before he’s out. This will be the biggest hurdle in weening Noah when I decide to do it. Without breastfeeding I don’t know how I will get him to sleep because I have NEVER been able to lay him down in his crib even vaguely awake without him standing up immediately and start rattling the crib railing. I really, really dread the weaning process. Not only will it be breaking a bond that only Noah and I have and eliminating one of the few times when I can just cuddle him close to me and not have him squirm off to do something else, but the change to his sleep routine will likely cause a lot of tears. Probably for us both.
And about Walmart – I agree they should be boycotted for many reasons and I hate going there, but the reality for us is that they are cheaper on many things, carry items that Target does not, and employ my Grammy.
10 comments:
I am totally with you on the Walmart thing. I hate that store, but because of budget constraints, am forced to shop there. And we don't have any other options in my small town to shop for things like pillows, and baking supplies.
After I graduated from college, I was super worried about parasites. I still cook the shit out of some meats because I'm sure we will all get a tape worm if I don't.
on one hand, I totally agree with you, and on the other, I feel like if the things we did were that damaging, we would all be alot more damaged. though it seems like every third person out there has cancer, so I guess you never know. probably the only person who has dyed their hair more often than you is me. with no end in sight. unless they come up with a color called "brown with gray streaks" and I can dye it back to my natural color.
I hope I haven't given you any pressure to wean. I know I go on about wanting to, but that's just because I personally don't really enjoy it that much anymore. to be honest, after it's all said and done, perhaps I'm a bit old fashioned about my titties and it feels sort of weird to me as she gets older. but I don't feel that way about anyone else but myself. lonna's a good role model for someone doing extended breast feeding, and I think you should do whatever you want!!
No - I don't feel pressured to wean because you are. Other stuff is going on.
I've always just hated my breasts so it's nice that they are finally doing something useful.
I don't want to breastfeed indefinitely either - I just am not in any immediate hurry.
I know what you mean about being worried about what chemicals can do to a human. Before we bought this house I was only using organic non-toxic cosmetics and buying organic cleaning products. Basically substituting organic anywhere possible. But now all of that extra money has to go towards the mortgage and bills and all of that. It's never made any sense to me why the natural or organic stuff costs so much more. It seems like it would cost less to make without all of those synthetics.
I hate that the good stuff such as organic and natural is so expensive. We don't use as much of it as most other vegans do either. It's too hard to do the research and find one with which you are comfortable.
As far as weaning, I'm lucky that I don't live near anyone who really care about me and my breasts other than Dermot and Ethan and they are both totally for continuing to nurse. The AAP suggests that mother and child nurse for as long as they are both comfortable. There is also research that suggests that humans naturally choose to wean between 2.5 and 7 years of age. In a lot of the world it's considered strange to actually wean your child. Most places see kids naturally wean around 4, that's the world wide average for weaning. But like I said, it's easier when no one is interfering with your decision. My mom hasn't brought it up in a long time and Ethan's mom was dropping hints when we were out there. "He'll have to wean sometime. What does your mother think of Dermot nursing?" I just answered her questions as if she didn't mean anything, but I'm pretty sure that she had ulterior motives. The World Health Organization and Unicef both say at least two years. So that's some ammunition for people who care about your business. My life would be hell if I weaned Dermot. Nursing is very important to him. It's how we reconnect after a day apart and it's how I calm him down if he's hurt of overstimulated. I call it baby xanax. It chills him right out. On the other hand, if it bothered me I would feel comfortable weaning him slowly and just dealing with his complaints for a week or two.
I do nurse bella anytime she's hurt or upset. when she falls, I nurse her. when she headbutts something too hard, I nurse her. I had read that there are natural analgesics in breastmilk plus she likes the comfort.
You think you are concerned about chemicals and stuff, I am very concerned but it is because I work around some of the worst carcinogens and mutagens out there, rocket fuel and oxidizer. Yes there are a lot of safety controls but I know I am still exposed to trace amounts.
Regarding Wal-Mart...we actually have some nice ones, and I like shopping there. Where else than a Supercenter can you buy just about anything in one (big) store?
About natural things...quite often the things that have been "proven" to be side effects of things like cleaning products and hair dye and deoderant and shampoo have been proven by introducing to lab animals amounts higher than any humans will use in their entire lifetimes. So the proof is a little bit on the sketchy side. If you continually soak your head in hair dye 24/7 for several years, it might cause some cancer. If you just dye your hair every couple of weeks like a normal person, it probably won't up your risk. My favorite little story is the one about aluminum in deoderant causing breast cancer by blocking your sweat glands. It's NOT true...but it scares those of us who worry about such things quite effectively. I want to note that I am not anti-organic and would love to live an organic lifestyle. However, I also am not anti-paying-the-bills, so I have to use more mainstream stuff for now.
As for breastfeeding, you and Mark are definitely in charge of that area. I love that you and Patrice both did the breastfeeding thing because I know a lot of people who try it, have a little trouble with it, and then give it up. I want to be a successful breastfeeder for as long as works for me...and you should do the same. Although, I have to admit, I do get a little weirded out about seeing a preschooler come up and use the proper words in asking his mom for her breast. But the first two years? I am with you at least that far!
When I had my first baby, I made a goal for myself to nurse for 6 months at least. We had a hard time getting started, and at the time 6 months seemed like forever. We ended up going for a year. Zach only lasted about 8 months, and I weaned them both when they started getting frustrated with my supply and biting me. With teeth. That seemed like a good sign that it was time to stop. I always enjoyed nursing a lot, and kindof wished Zach would have gone longer. It's such a personal decision, don't let anyone make it for you. Like you would.
Regarding licking the glue - don't forget that George Costanza lost his girlfriend to poisonous envelope glue.
Regarding breastfeeding - My truly selfish reasons for you to wean Noah is so that he can spend the night at my house. Also, because I believe you can get pregnant faster when you are not breastfeeding, and I am definitely looking forward to grandbaby #2. You know how I am - I have to have at least 2 of everything that I really love!!
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