Saturday, October 24, 2009

My three sons

A photo at 20 weeks.
It's a triple! Relieved to be able to reuse the ridiculous amounts of clothes I have stored away. And honestly a bit relieved to not be raising a girl in the city. My teen years were spent living in the woods with the only boy nearby being my gay friend David. There wasn't much opportunity for getting into trouble before I could drive. These days the 14 year olds seem far too advanced and far too often with the 17 year old boys or worse. Just thinking about it makes me shiver. But boys definitely seem the easier route to me.
It's funny. I'd always assumed I'd have girls. I babysat all girls and I took care of my baby sisters. And Mark always assumed we'd have girls too. And when I found out Noah was a boy I was honestly a bit disappointed. The biggest issue with me being my hatred of sports and the perception of boys being so much more rough and tumble. But then there was Noah - and he's not very rough and tumble. Or very interested in sports. And he just felt right. He is right. He's my Noah. And when I was pregnant with Ray I thought it would be nice to have a girl just because it was the other option and I'm one for balance but when I found it he was a boy too I thought that just felt right. And he is. He's a bit more tumble but not rough. And he's my Ray. And now boy number three - and it's right. But who will he be? I'm excited to find out.

Monday, October 19, 2009

Surviving in a world of no naps.

I’ll just start in as if no time has passed.

I’m 20 weeks pregnant today! That’s halfway. I’d say time flies but sometimes pregnancy seems relentless and long. And how goes pregnancy? Is it different this time around? YES! Very different. With both boys I had a voracious appetite – this time I’m squeamish often and occasionally not too keen on eating. This is probably why I gained 70 lbs when pregnant with Noah, 40 lbs while pregnant with Ray, and thus far 9 lbs halfway into this pregnant. This is a very good thing as I was hanging on to 10 souvenir lbs from Noah and 10 more from Ray. Also our Guatemala trip would seem really daunting if I was ballooning up. Don’t get me wrong – I look pregnant. Super pregnant. My body took to a third pregnancy instantly and I felt like I was showing in a matter of weeks. But luckily most of the weight is belly. Other differences – horribly painful and unsightly varicose veins that have my right leg looking like a road map, an irritating and large rash under my right breast that is constantly fighting with my underwire bras, and ridiculous acne like none I’ve ever had before. On the plus side my energy level is pretty good considering I’m chasing around 2 boys most hours. Neither one naps any longer so there is no rest for me either. I’m occasionally in bed before 10 but for the most part I’m holding it together. I’ve also welcomed back acid reflux and hip joint pain, it’s like they never left.

So – pregnancy very different. As a result I kind of think I’m having a girl. Everyone still rooting for a girl, except for me. I’m just staring at bins and bins of boy clothes in the basement muttering to myself “I don’t want any more STUFF.” We have our 20 wk ultrasound on Friday and are eager for the big reveal.

And what of Master Noah? He adores his school. There were no issues adjusting to three 6 hour days. He is making friends and learning tons. His school focuses on arts and he’s loving learning about musical notes, doing yoga, painting and drawing every day. They also do a lot of imaginative play time too. And now I’m on the research hunt for Kindergarten. I have to do school visits and interviews and paperwork. Our neighborhood school is most likely not sufficient for him so we have to see if we can transfer him to another public neighborhood school, get him in a public charter school or commit to paying for a private school. It’s stressing me out to say the least and I SO look forward to the decision being made and settled, of course that may not happen for certain for 10 months. He’s had another couple of days of atypical rudeness and defiance lately and I’m hoping it’s just another passing phase. It seems to happen every couple of months and then just goes away, thankfully.

I wish I could say that Ray was loving school. It’s been several weeks of struggling with his fear of school. He cries while getting ready and at drop off. It’s taking him awhile to get adjusted – but I think he’s finally coming around as the last two times I picked him up he said he had fun and gushed about all the things he did. He’s in a very clingy stage – partially brought on by school and probably also having to do with my pregnancy. He takes a tumbling class now – one in which I participate with him – and though every other kid in his class allows the teacher to help them with the trick of the day, he won’t allow anyone but me to help him. He wants me to do everything for him, even complaining if Mark tries to change his diaper, and sometimes he doesn’t even want to let me shower. I really don’t mind clingy much, I like being needed. But with only 20 weeks until a newborn I’m a bit stressed out about his need to transition to sleeping in a room with Noah, with Mark able to put him to sleep and do bath without screams of agony. But that aside – I can’t say enough wonderful things about Ray. This really is my favorite age. He’s just so joyous, loving and fun. I am really enjoying having quality time with him while Noah is at school.

What else has been up? We’ve been insanely busy, but that seems usual for us. Family visits, shopping, library visits, field trips, fall frolicking. It keeps us very busy. And on days with no plans I go a little crazy.

I’ve also been co-teaching a science and nature discovery playgroup for kids Noah’s age. We meet weekly and read a picture book on a topic like gravity, shadows, the senses, the chemistry of cooking – and then do a relevant experiment. It’s been a bit of work but also a lot of fun. Nice to do a little something extra outside of just Mom-ing. And both boys seem to be getting something out of it.

Guatemala! It’s 3 and a half weeks away. We have a few more plans to cobble into place. We are very excited. I’m a bit disappointed that I’ve not had much time to work on my Spanish but I’m sure we will be fine as both hotels we are staying in are run by English speakers. The big challenge is going to be the first day of travel – it will consist of 2 three hour flights and a 3 hour shuttle ride – and with waiting I anticipate it to be a 12 hour slog of a day starting at 4 am. But if we survive that day we will be golden. On second thought the packing may be the hardest. I hate packing – especially under size and weight constraints. But it’s going to be an adventure of a lifetime.

Oh Noah’s fifth birthday is 2 weeks away. We’re having his party at a farm with a hayride and whatnot. It should be fun if the weather isn’t frigid and rainy. Five. I can’t believe it. I keep worrying that he is going to stop being fun. But it’s still so fun to share new things with him – David Bowie, Where the Wild Things Are, books like Hugo Cabret, shows by Cirque du Soleil. He seems so inspired by everything. That sort of childlike awe and appreciation of things new is part of what makes being with the kids so awesome for me. I hope that the eagerness to discover new things in art, in people, in the world is something I can instill in them for life.