On sleep, sass and sisters.

Yesterday I didn’t have any time to blog or do much of anything. I got a killer headache first thing so I decided to nap with Noah in the morning. Had I known that would be his only nap all day I might have made a different decision. Though he was obviously exhausted Noah would not take a nap in the afternoon. I made three attempts to get him to sleep and failed at all three. I’ve been wondering when I should try to transition him from two naps to one but I’ve been hesitant because whenever he’s up for more than four hours at a time he gets cranky and clingy. But maybe yesterday was a sign. If this happens a couple of times I think a nap shift will be in the works.

By yesterday evening I was feeling really frustrated. I was frustrated that the house is still a mess and any straightening I do doesn’t seem to make a dent in it. I was frustrated that I didn’t have one waking moment to myself all day. I was frustrated because my headache lasted most of the day. I was frustrated that ABC skipped a bunch of Lost episodes and I now have no idea what is going on. And I was frustrated because any time you try to do something three times and you fail each and every time it’s simply frustrating. But yesterday is yesterday and today is today.

More on Noah’s growing independence. Recently he’s begun shooing hands away. If I’m trying to help him or get him to stop doing something he will actually push my hand away. He’s one step away from telling me to “talk to the hand.” He also began laughing at his own jokes. A couple of nights ago he blew a raspberry while Mark was feeding him, spit some of his food out and began laughing hysterically. Mark and I were flabbergasted and made the mistake of laughing too. Now he wants to do it at every meal. The other day I had to interrupt both lunch and dinner when he spit by telling him he was all done and taking his bib off. He cried, I told him no more spitting and then the rest of the meals went peaceably. He’s also started chasing Parker around. I don’t know if I’d classify it as a first word – but he repeatedly uses a close approximation of “Ki-deee” in reference to the cats.

My sister Elisha bought her bus ticket Wednesday and she’ll finally be visiting us and meeting Noah. I’ve been sort of disappointed that she hasn’t come sooner, but I have to remind myself that people are wrapped up in their own lives, with their own dramas. Especially when they’re young – Elisha just turned 21 this past spring. Since she married at 19 I’m often conflicted about whether to consider her an adult or a child. Her and her husband currently live at Fort Drum in upstate New York which is about a six hour drive north of here, but they will be moving back to Florida by the end of the year. One of the reasons I’ve been upset that she hasn’t visited us in almost two years is because she’s probably living closer to me now then she ever will in the future. And I had a baby, dammit.

Also I have half-sister jealousy. Let me explain. Though I have siblings who mean the world to me, they are all half-siblings through my father and I was raised by my mother as an only child. All three of my half-siblings however were raised with other half-siblings with whom they lived. I often have the feeling that no matter how much they mean to me because they are the only siblings I’ve got that what I mean to them will be less because they didn’t grow up with me. And in the case of Elisha I feel that if her sisters Barbara or Cathy had a baby that she would’ve been more interested or visited sooner. Or even sent a card. In fact Cathy did have a baby and Elisha saw her at Christmas last year. But like I said, maybe it’s just because Elisha is 21.

Anyway – I love Elisha very much. She is one of my favorite people in the world and I’m very excited to see her. I just have to make sure to check the hurt I’ve been feeling so as not to ruin her visit. She is very sensitive to even any implied criticism and I want to enjoy the very limited time we’ll have to spend together.

Well my house is STILL in a shambles, as I may have mentioned and it’s gonna be a busy weekend. Tomorrow Noah, Patrice, Bella and I will be attending a bridal shower and Sunday I have a meeting scheduled on that freelance PR project. I’d love to attend at least one measely Fringe show, but I’m not sure how and when that will happen. Money, baby and scheduling are all issues. Gone are the days when I’d see ten things. At least temporarily gone.